Conspiracy theories in Smurfland.. keep it on the low down and hush hush!
Was there really a Murder in Smurfland? Was there a cover up or just another conspiracy theory?
And as if this police photo of a chalk outline of the victim wasn't proof enough
 What do you say, um, sir? "I Hate Murders" |
We have obtained a rare interview with one of the inhabitants of Smurfland We have promised to hide his identity for his own safety.
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Is the much denied Area51 actually near Smurfland?
The US Government have denied the existence of this top secret location, but they have never denied the
existence of Smurfland. In a resent incident; Our source revealed, that "he" was out drinking, when "he" was
abducted by little blue men who tortured him with their singing and repeated reruns of their TV program!
"He" now permanently has the Smurf theme music going through his head. Shocking!! I just can't get over it!
The Moon landing site used in 1969 by NASA has been found a few days treck from Smurfland.
Papa Smurf knew all about this site and arranged for the drugging and abduction of Astrosmurf
to this same location. This cloak and dagger exercise was later dramatised for TV and
distributed in a book, as propaganda of just how far Papa Smurf is willing to go!
Wasn't it strange in the story "the Astrosmurf" that Papa knew exactly where to go?
It has been said that Papa Smurf was in on the NASA film crew back in 1965 ... well it took four years to edit!!
The Reason that the KKK wear peaked hoods is to both protect their identity and hide their size.
This report hot off the wire...
The Smurfs are actively involved in the KKK and they even wear their white hats without the peak
on childrens television. SHAMELESS!!!
Rumours exist linking Papa Smurf's henchman 'Heft' to the JFK assassination. And of many
smurfs living in Smurfland, why is it that very little is ever heard from sleazy smurf
(the black sheep of the family, and the one no-one talks about). Was it there really a link
to Marilyn Monroe in a much rumoured love triangle? And who is the last of this trio still active?
You see that Papa Smurf left no loose ends here either.
George W Bush has recently been sending the CIA in to investigate reports that the Smurfs
may be stock piling Weapons of Mass Destruction. If you have any such information please
inform the Whitehouse with your evidence, at once!
NEWS FLASH .. This report just in...
At great personal risk to the photographer, we are now able to bring you these pictures
taken at a top secret location. We see in the foreground that the place is under a guard
of four smurfs. Smurfette in an obviously military uniform, albeit pink! is leading three
smurfs in a Soviet style goose step march around a road barrier. As proof that this goes
right to the top, we also see Papa smurf looking on in approval. He can't deny this
photographic proof now. In the background we see a number of smurfs working on various
munitions. You can tell they have done this before.
Is there a possible Mafia link to Smurfland? They are just like one big family right?
they all take care of their own right? wink wink nudge nudge need we say more.
a recent picture of the Don Papa Smurf (have you seen this man.. if so don't approach him).
This week in politicsAre smurfs really communists? The debate rages on... PLUS shocking admission from Grouchy that he "Hates politics" 
Smurfy scenesJust another day in the life of a smurf? For the first time ever, Caught on camera, shocking new pictures come to light. (2 page exclusive) Pictures that all others were too afraid to publish. Are smurfs living in your computer? They make it look all too easy see how here It is said that inside all of us is a small blue person just screaming to get out Are you in touch with your inner smurf or are you really a smurf trapped in a human body and still in denial?
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Tell all Feature story "Sexism in Smurfland" Smurfette reveals what its really like living in a smurf dominated world 
Care and FeedingSensational New Wonder Diet How Smurfette lost a gram in a month All is revealed 
Smurfs are from Marsand Smurfettes from Venus Vanity smurf talks openly and frankly about gender issues in an attempt to clarify issues, only to result in making himself even more confused
Smurfette talks on hair care and why her's is yellow.
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Its like the X-files but only more sinister
COMING UP NEXT ISSUE:
Discontent in the Smurf village
Startling new revelation from an unnamed inside
source, whos identity has been hidden for
everyones protection.
Well Okay I can't keep a secret, it _was_ Grouchy!
What is the breakfast cerial of the smurfs?
Whos shirts don't they wear and why?
Whats their favourite colour and who cares?
...Oh Smurf horoscopes for your Smurf star signs
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